As soon as Patrick Mele walks into a new client’s home, he knows what needs to be changed. His clients, however, are not always so certain.
So begins the delicate art of persuasion, a skill that is as much a part of a designer’s job description as selecting fabrics and furnishings. Homeowners choose decorators for their style and sensibility. But once the process begins, they may struggle to connect the photographs in the portfolio with the vision for their real-life living room. When feet get cold, a designer must play the role of confidant, trusted friend, and psychologist. Hold back, and the finished product may disappoint. Push too hard, and a client may feel bullied.
“People are coming to you for what you’re good at. But more often than not, they don’t want to let you do what you know how to do,” says Mele, who is currently trying to persuade a client in Connecticut to add chintz fabric wall coverings in the living room. Yet, “It is your job to try to create the best version of the person that’s in front of you” for their home, he says.
How a designer gets a client to the finish line varies by individual, with methods that shift depending on the situation. AD PRO spoke with decorators to find out what strategies work best and when to use each one.
Build Trust
A designer is part salesman, part BFF. Switching hats is a lot easier if you know your clients well. Before dropping any big ideas, Jenny Dina Kirschner takes them to lunch, invites them to her home, and asks them about their lives. “When it comes time to push them to think outside the box, to take that risk, it’s going to be a lot more smooth and easy” if you’ve established a warm relationship beforehand, she says.
Six months ago, the designer was working on a Brooklyn condo and found a vintage chair on Chairish. She knew it would be perfect for the master bedroom. But the chair, which was in Kirschner’s apartment, was in rough condition, with cracked, two-toned leather. One afternoon, when her client was over, Kirschner decided to make her pitch. She casually suggested her guest sit in it. When she recoiled at the upholstery, Kirschner described how it would look reupholstered in fluffy white long-haired alpaca, telling her, “It’s going to be stunning and it’s going to be fabulously soft and glamorous like a cloud.” Her client was ultimately sold, and the chair found its new home.
Create Teachable Moments
Some clients need clearer visual cues. Mele plucks his from restaurants, hotels, art galleries, and museums. “If you use the word teal, some people may [say they] hate teal,” he says. But “show it in the context of what an incredible artist has done before, and, hopefully, people can see that.”
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Penny Drue Baird never presents a bold idea out of nowhere. Instead, she unveils it in a detailed design presentation. “It’s very involved,” she says of her presentations, which include perspective drawings and elevations. “The more crazy it is, the more we draw it.”
Before you present an idea, you need to know what a client might actually like, particularly one with a reserved aesthetic. To figure out what might inspire, Miles Redd lays out different materials—trying out textures, fabrics, and colors—to see what strikes a chord. “It’s about finding the right touchstone,” he says. “Your entire palette might be pale white, but you might respond to a deep blue lacquer.”
Pick Your Battles
Knowing when to hold back is as important as knowing when to push the envelope. The end goal is to create a home that resonates. Sometimes, that means letting the client call the shots. “The client wants to feel empowered; they want to feel like they’re in the driver’s seat,” Mele says. “They want to know that they’re being heard.”
And a homeowner might come around eventually. Michelle Nussbaumer had a client who insisted on a “weird lounge chair” in the family room. A few weeks later, she called the client back and asked for a do-over. They ended up redesigning the entire room—and the client loved the final result.
But Nussbaumber says she tends to be upfront when an idea won’t work. “I’m from the school of bluntness and honesty,” she says. Instead of handholding, she is quick to remind her clients that they hired her for a reason. “If you listen to me, magic will happen,” she says.
